Thinking about ourselves – our feelings, our past, our desires and our hopes – is a hugely tricky task that most of spend a good deal of effort trying very hard to avoid. We keep away from ourselves because so much of what we could discover threatens to be painful. We might find that we were, in the background, deeply furious with, and resentful about, certain people we were only meant to love. We might discover how much ground there was to feel inadequate and guilty on account of the many errors and misjudgements we have made. We might find that though we wanted to be decent, law-abiding people, we harboured fantasies that went in appallingly deviant and aberrant directions. We might recognise how much was nauseatingly compromised and needed to be changed about our relationships and careers.